


Afterglow

by bccalling



Series: Proposals [1]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: M/M, Season/Series 10, Spoilers, maybe? - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 07:56:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21250016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bccalling/pseuds/bccalling
Summary: Ian's finally sure Mickey's it for him.





	Afterglow

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Season 10 spoilers.  
Also, I'm actually planning a more fleshed out version of this, but this is how it ended up on the page the first time through, so I figured I'd share it as is for now.  
And please forgive any weird formatting--I'm posting in a rush. Will edit for formatting later.
> 
> My theme song for this is Taylor Swift's "Afterglow"--hence, the title.

* * *

“The fuck you want?” The words are biting; Mickey’s tone cold as he stubs out a cigarette on the bench beside him. For a moment, he glances Ian’s way, but his eyes don’t linger and they never once meet Ian’s.  
Ian feels the cold more than ever then, shrinking in on himself and stuffing his hands deeper into the pockets of his coat, dropping his eyes to the ground. He doesn’t try to approach any further. Stays several feet away from Mickey. Doesn’t want to push.  
“Spit it the fuck out, Gallagher,” Mickey spits, anger and irritation dripping from his lips with just a hint of hurt.  
Ian hates that he’s the reason for it.  
“Just wanted to talk to you,” Ian confesses quietly, so soft he’s not sure Mickey hears. “Needed to see you.”  
Mickey lets out a harsh breath at that, huffing out an angry laugh and shaking his head. “Well, I’m fuckin’ here, so either talk or I’m fuckin’ gone.”  
Ian releases the breath he was holding slowly, watching as the air turns to fog in front of his eyes, the glow from the field lights reflecting just enough for Ian to make out Mickey’s eyes in the darkness. He can’t meet them, so instead he sits. Close, but far enough that they’re not in danger of touching. Mickey tenses. It doesn’t go unnoticed, and it fucking hurts, Ian’s chest tightening until he feels like he might choke on the tears he’s fighting.  
Ian stays quiet.  
Mickey waits.  
“I fucked up,” Ian finally whispers. He’s trying to keep it together. Glances at Mickey. Tries to catch his eye.  
Mickey avoids, anger twisting his features as he shakes his head in disbelief. “What brought this on, huh?” His voice is level, but there’s a distinctive undertone of shrouded rage. Ian knows it all too well. “You hear I’m seein’ someone and decide you gotta put a stop to it? ‘Cause I’m not allowed to ever be fuckin’ happy in your eyes, huh?”  
Ian blinks. Shock washing over him as his world begins spinning. Mickey was seeing someone. Someone else.  
“I didn’t know,” the words tumble over each other as they spill out, but Mickey hears him. Mickey always hears him.  
“Like fuck you didn’t know,” Mickey accuses, voice harsh as he watches Ian incredulously.  
“I swear,” Ian promises, finally meeting Mickey’s eyes. His fingers grip hard at the metal beneath him, trying to keep himself upright. Lets out a shaky breath. “’m sorry.” Mumbled. Too quiet. Breath catches in the back of his throat as tries to keep himself from spiraling. Mickey watches him carefully, eyes unreadable, as Ian tries to pull himself together. It takes a moment, but he manages, goes to push himself up from the bench as the words “I’ll go” tumble out.  
Mickey’s fingers find his wrist before he can make it up, and it stops Ian in his tracks. Freezes him there on that bench. He folds in on himself again, shrinking right there before Mickey’s gaze. He hadn’t known. Some part of him still imagined Mickey would never want anyone else. That no matter what Ian fucked up, Mickey would be there, waiting. It was unfair. Ian knows that. And the reality of that realization fills him with guilt.

He can’t go through with it now. Wouldn’t be right. No matter how much he wants.

Mickey keeps his fingers against Ian’s skin. Barely touching, but enough to ground him. Keep him from moving.  
After a moment, Mickey lets out a sigh. Defenses weakening as he watches Ian carefully. “You really didn’t know.”  
It’s not a question, but Ian shakes his head anyway out of sheer instinct.  
Mickey nods. Then, “Not really even true, I guess. Went out once. He was a fuckin’ dud. Can’t even remember his name.” Ian lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Not you, ya know?”  
And yeah. Ian knows. Nods and offers a sad smile. Mickey’s lips tip up in return. Fingers fall away as he realizes Ian’s not running. All Ian can see in Mickey’s eyes is the hurt he’s caused, though. Hates himself for causing all that pain.  
Again.  
They sit in silence for long moments, the wind whistling around them as the breeze kicks up. Ian’s not sure if it’s the crisp autumn air or the ice in his heart that leaves him feeling frozen to his very core.

Mickey finally breaks the silence. “Why are we here, Ian? Thought we were on a break.”  
Eyes lift to Ian’s. Ian sees a glint of hope somewhere hiding behind the cold blue.  
Ian stays silent, gloved fingers straying to his pocket, where he closes his palm around warm metal. Mickey’s watching him carefully, waiting for an answer. Ian knows he has to try. Pulls his hand from his pocket and reaches for Mickey’s with the other. His free hand cradles Mickey’s as he presses the ring into Mickey’s open palm.  
“I love you,” Ian says simply, fingers still lingering against Mickey’s skin for a moment as he watches the other man carefully.  
Mickey’s brow furrows in confusion as he opens his palm to inspect the simple gold band that Ian’s left there. “Ian…?” He asks carefully. Blue eyes sweeping up to meet with green. “What is this?”  
“I fucked up,” Ian whispers. Voice quiet. A little tremble from the tears he’s holding back. “I don’t want a break. I thought I did, but—fuck—I can’t be without you.”  
“Ian?” Mickey insists, voice a little harsher, trying to find the answer he’s looking for. “What is this?”  
Ian locks eyes with Mickey. Holds his gaze steady in the dim light. “I want forever with you, Mickey. Do you want forever with me?”  
For long moments, Mickey’s quiet. Takes it all in. Never drops his eyes from Ian’s.  
“You serious?” Mickey asks, no more anger or irritation or pity in his soft tone—replaced instead with something that sounds a little like awe.  
Ian catches Mickey’s eye, swallows hard to fight a sob as a tear escapes his eye. Can’t speak. Just nods—almost imperceptible, but there.  
And then there’s a smile. Just a gentle tilt at the corners of Mickey’s mouth. But Ian sees it.  
“Yeah,” Mickey agrees then, a restrained laugh huffing from his chest as his smile grows, “yeah. Yes. Yes, Ian.”  
“Yeah?” Ian asks—unsure. Maybe he’s dreaming?  
But when Mickey nods desperately and surges forward to capture Ian’s lips in a kiss, all of the tension he’d been holding leaves Ian’s body and he slumps into Mickey’s arms, falling against him as they laugh through their tears. Ian has a lot to make up for. Years worth of sorries to prove himself worthy of Mickey’s love.  
But they have forever now, he thinks, as he gathers Mickey into his arms and presses kisses to his face until he finally pulls back to gather the ring from Mickey’s palm, fingers lingering against Mickey’s skin for a moment.

When he slides the ring into place on Mickey’s finger, Ian feels his heart swell—the simple gold glinting in the dim light.  
Subtle. Powerful.  
Because it means they belong to each other. It means forever.  
Ian carefully twines his fingers with Mickey’s. Smiles through his tears.  
“I love you.”  
Mickey knows. Nods gently. Reaches for Ian.  
Sorry can wait.

They have forever.

* * *


End file.
